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Archive for July 15, 2025

A Woman Accepted a New Job, Then Her Mom Died. Her New Boss’s Response Left Her in Tears.

DailyGood: News That Inspires – Jul 15, 2025

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News That Inspires
Jul 15, 2025
A Woman Accepted a New Job, Then Her Mom Died. Her New Boss's Response Left Her in Tears.
“You’ll come to your own peace, hopefully, but it will be on your own, in your own time.”

— Cathy Lamb

A Woman Accepted a New Job, Then Her Mom Died. Her New Boss’s Response Left Her in Tears.

“Grief does not fit a 3-5 day schedule” was the caption on a photo of a family at a funeral home. Yet, 3-5 days is the average paid bereavement time for US companies, and not much better in other countries. There is hope for change. In the meantime, a few managers are finding creative ways around corporate policies. One example is of a woman who accepted a new job, then lost her mom. The manager “honored not only the job offer, but the initial start date as well. Then, he gave the woman six weeks of paid leave right off the bat, before she’d ever had a single day of work.” Other stories highlight managers giving people extended paid time off without fear of losing their jobs. “It’s the leave you hope you never have to use, but let’s be clear, it’s no vacation. Having at least a few paid days off is the bare minimum a human being needs to function after a loss.”

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When Solutions Are Technologies Of Avoidance

Weekly excerpt to help us remember the sacred.

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Weekly Reading Jul 14, 2025

When Solutions Are Technologies Of Avoidance

–Bayo Akomolafe

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6875a963a9853-2622.jpgWhen things don’t go according to plan, when the laboratory explodes into splinters of glass, smoke, and worthy intentions, it is very usual to subject the errant event to an analysis of what went wrong so we can draw useful lessons. Who doesn’t do this? We all do, I suppose. But of late I have wondered whether this very obvious thing to do isn’t a getting around something else — a blindness to a different sense of things.

The Yoruba have a proverb: Ile oba t’o jo, ewa lo busi. The king’s palace burns, and is more beautiful. You might think you’ve heard this before in a more familiar saying about dark clouds with silver linings or some other anecdote with the germ of the idea that rough times don’t last. But I think the Yoruba proverb is saying something more. Something else. Instead of merely instrumentalizing the failure, quarantining it behind the defence mechanisms of the ego, surrounding it with measuring devices to extract nuggets of wisdom, and processing those rough resources into bullions of solutions, I think it suggests that there’s wisdom in being taken by it. Taken by the plumes braiding the air with our desperation. Taken by the mystery of this thing we rudely call life that isn’t anchored to our best efforts. Taken – at least for the moment – by the disruption; by the glitch; by the dying; by the swaying; by the memorized lines that won’t show up when it is time; by the limbs that won’t move when we will them to; by the lyrics that travel to the places where migrant darlings – killed by their authors – take up new dwellings.

At what point do solutions become technologies of avoidance? And is it okay to try something else? To let the ruins become fleeting messengers of a queer commonwealth of abundance in a world that is richer with losses than with the things that are lost?

Failure is difficult. Humiliating. But I suspect there is some gift, some beauty – a lock of Persephone’s hair, maybe – in bowing down ever so slightly to the tornado as it screams across the plains in front of you, a dismembered town left in its wake.

"Look for the black goat while it is daytime," another Nigerian proverb cautions. There is a time for solutions. Then there are other times. Let them pass unnamed.

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What do you make of the notion that there may be wisdom in allowing oneself to be “taken” by failure, rather than simply analyzing it for solutions? Can you share a personal story that reflects the experience of embracing disruption or failure in a way that led to unexpected beauty or insight? What helps you allow moments of “failure” and “disruption” to unfold without rushing to resolve or fix them immediately?

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